Dating and setting boundaries as we live in a funny world. Some of us want to settle down, and others want to do the Opposite.

I hear from people all the time about how they are giving up on dating because the dates are horrendous and that no one is genuine.

I honestly believe in setting boundaries before you go on a date, chat with them for a few weeks and work out what they are about. You do not have to throw yourself into anything straight away.

In this time you will also pick up on any red flags, and someone once said to me if it’s too good to be true it usually is so trusting your intuition is the ultimate act of trusting yourself.


Having a healthy relationship first starts from within you have to love yourself first before anyone else can love you, make sure you are mentally ready for dating. Write down a list of what you are looking for.

Why waste your time if you don’t even have the same interests or outlooks on life. It is not about pre-judging someone before you meet; it is about not wasting your time.

I would be thinking about my energy and who I would vibe with. You want to be able to enjoy each other’s company and have a good time, so why settle for anything less, life is way too short to waste time.

If you are not interested in Dating websites, then get your friends or work colleagues or even family members to set you up but again you do not have to date straight away you can swap numbers or emails till you find you are in the right position to meet up.

You can meet some incredible people through friends, and you do not have to waste your time and energy into scanning profiles of people.

Networking and joining community events is another way of getting out there or even joining the local book club or gym or whatever your hobbies you enjoy.

There are so many area’s regarding dating you are never too old to find your soulmate and hopefully, with our stories here at  Positive Lifestyle we can change all this for you and get you going in the right direction.

In the early days of dating someone can all be butterflies and rose-tinted glasses, you are learning about all their quirks and figuring each other out.

Usually, what a person shows you, in the beginning, is who they are, so this is what you will be getting in the long run.

Finding love should never mean feeling uncomfortable and doing things you don’t want to do or feeling any kind of pressure.

A ref flag early in the relationship is called “love bombing” they over compliment you and wants to get serious a week into the relationship, this could be a sign of possessive behaviour and this is just a no for a future relationship.

Some people have narcissist behaviours by hiding behind jokey insults or backhanded compliments if this happens early on I would avoid and move on. If people show you lack of respect after a few dates, imagine what it would be like three months down the line. 

By four or five dates, you will know whether this person is someone you have a natural fit with so if anything has made you feel uncomfortable or raised your suspicions early on then run for the hills.

All of the disaster dates, mismatched relationships may have one feeling that they will never meet the soul mate, take yourself out your comfort zone and do something you haven’t done before.

We first meet someone you know if you attracted to them by the end of that date and yes some people say chemistry can develop over time, but you still need that initial spark. Chemistry is a feeling; its what makes a relationship work, it’s that feeling of just clicking with someone.

When you have chemistry with someone, they monopolise your thoughts and your free time. You stay awake talking till the sun comes up and not even feel like an hour has gone.

Communication is the key also, and as long as you are sharing values, lifestyle, humour and supporting each other, then these are the things what make lasting happy relationships.